i know now that whatever i say can only translate to you as sadness. but i'll keep talking anyway, try to tell you things i think you need to hear, want to hear, even if i can't speak them to you directly, even if they can bring nothing but more tears.
after i gave up my old life for the new, i promised i would never make a decision i didn't know was something i truly wanted for myself. i never believed in promises, and it's clear to me now, here in a world entirely devoid of the one i've known all my life, that i failed to keep that one i made myself not too long ago.
but i believe in this one, and will do my best to keep it: you are the reason i'm here, and i'll make it, somehow, worth it for both of us.
*
because this is, in a way, my fault, i take time out to recommend this blog:
http://nontrivialpursuit.blogspot.com/
E. Cross Saltire is one of the smartest people i know, and one of my best friends. you should listen to what he has to say. disagree at will.
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